Thanksgiving & Update

It is time for a long overdue update-i do apologize. But first, I want to wish everyone a very wonderful and Blessed Thanksgiving. Give Thanks to the Lord, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever!!!! Remember who to thank-Our God, our one and only Savior. I am thankful for so many things, but most importantly, I am thankful for the Lord giving me a second chance at life, and the opportunity to glorify him in all that I do. Although this road may be difficult, I know he is leading me into this ministry for a reason.

As a short update, I was in the hospital from November 9th through the 19, which started out as chest pain and nausea, and turned in to infection. Thankfully this stay was a tad bit shorter, and i did not miss too much of school. As usual, it will take me awhile to gain my energy and strength back. My school semester is nearing the end. I have some exams coming up in the next few weeks, then I will be officially entering my last semester of nursing school.

So many people have asked lately: How are you doing nursing school. And i've talked a little bit about this on my blog. But my 1st and foremost reason, is because this is the path I believe the Lord is leading me down. This is a ministry for me. I have such a huge passion for children, and a love for the lord, that I cant' wait to put that into practice. There may be difficult times down the road, but I truly believe the Lord will get me through them, because this is my way of serving the Lord. It's very hard now to see this, as i've had many trials through nursing school that question will I be healthy enough to work. Honestly, I've never thought about that in detail. I always assume I will be healthy enough. This year I have had some progression of chronic rejection. I have started back treatment, for the 3rd time as well for it. As I started to ponder, I actually got really scared about what was going to happen. Will I make it through 1 more semester? Will I live to work? What if type of questions. I never thought that the sentence in the newspaper about my transplant in 2004 would be true: "This transplant should give Katey another 5 years of life." (even though I am almost 8 yrs post transplant). Heck....I was actually pretty mad at that statement, because I had plans on living til I was 90 something years old. And I'm not saying that isn't possible. But the possibility that the chronic rejection could progress to the need for a 2nd transplant sooner than later, definitely worries me. I'm not scared of Death, but i just didn't think the possibility of it could come sooner than I thought.

But then after tonight's Thanksgiving service at my church, I realized that God's love endures forever....whether I continue to live on Earth, or not; whether I graduate with my BSN and work in pediatric nursing. Only God has those answers right now. I need to be thankful for God, and for the wonderful and amazing things he has given me and my family. I honestly need to go back to taking it one day at a time. When trouble comes, deal with it, then pick back up on my feet and keep running.

So this Thanksgiving, remember to thank God first and foremost. Be thankful you can breathe. Be thankful you are alive and well. The Lord's love endures forever, despite your pitfalls, failures, or even death. Be thankful for that this Thanksgiving.

Please say a special prayer for my friend, Amy Crews. She and I have a special bond, and she is currently waiting for her 2nd lung transplant. Please lift her up in your prayers over the holidays. Thank you!

Love to you all,

Happy New Year/Back to School

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!! I Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas! I know this year is going to be awesome...and I can't wait to see what is in store for 2011!!
I start back classes tomorrow-Tuesday...wow...time flies by! I'll do my best to keep up with blogging. Hopefully it won't be as busy or stressful as last semester :)


I started getting sick again at the middle of last week. So, I started on another round of oral antibiotics (Cipro) for 2-3 weeks. I've only been off the IV antibiotics about 2 1/2 weeks...so praying the Cipro knocks whatever this out and i can start the new semester off feeling good!

A Couple of New Year's resolutions:
1.     To be a better Christ follower. To make more of an effort to attend church and Sunday School more often (I did a horrible job of this last year....using excuses of school and health...although a lot of times it was legit). I attended Sunday School yesterday-Sunday-and joined a new life group, which is sort of like a small bible study and accountability group. I think that will be great and help keep me connected during the school year. I get caught up so much with school and other stresses of life, that I forget and don't make time to spend with God.

2.     Another resolution...to be on time!! I used to always be on time or even early. Now I find myself rushing everywhere...either arriving just on time or a little late.

3.     I also want to decrease the procrastination I have in me when it comes to studying...lol!! I don't wait til the night before, but I really need to start studying every day so i don't have to cram before exams :)

4.     EXERCISE!! I say this every year. It's more of a time conflict than a motivation issue. I am motivated and want to do it. But with nursing school, there is literally zero free time, and if you have free time, it's spent studying. So I'm going to try to at least do the exercise bike we have at home a few nights a week. I do get a lot of exercise (more than before) in with nursing school, and I think it has helped me feel better and increased my breathing capacity (although i feel like i can't breathe..lol) as well as my O2 saturation. So we'll see where this leads too!.

5.    And last, but not least: be a better sister. My brother and I get in so so many fights (verbally) when he comes home for holidays. I always tell myself that it's not going to happen and I'm just going to ignore things he says that makes me mad, and try to watch what i do as well. But it seems like it never happens. So I am really, seriously, going to make an actual effort to get along with my wonderful brother...always :)

Ok...I'm up late...need to go to bed. Lots of stuff to do today (Monday) before class tomorrow! For all of my fellow CF and Transplant Blog Followers...I will be praying that 2011 will be an awesome year for you and that you will feel amazing and be able to do amazing things. Hang in there! Love you all!!


Happy 2011!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Merry Christmas! I hope everyone had a wonderful and blessed Christmas today and throughout the holidays. I am so blessed to be able to celebrate another Christmas with my friends and family. And I'm so thankful to Jesus, for his birth, and for his Crucifixion and Resurrection!!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to everyone!

Friday News

I am headed to the lake tonight for hopefully a nice and relaxing weekend. I was wrong about not getting a day off from classes for the 4th holiday. I thought our professor had July 5th on our syllabus, but he didn't, and he verified in class on Wednesday, that Monday is indeed a university wide holiday...YAY. So that means an extra day at the lake. Of course I have to take studying stuff with me. I've been spending the majority of my time studying Microbiology, that I haven't had time to do much for my online Developmental Psychology course. And I didn't do too hot on the last exam. So I will be catching up in this course at the lake. We have an exam due by Wednesday, a project due next Sunday, and a few other assignments. The professor uploads her lectures to the course website (since it is an online course). That is the only thing I don't like. Most of the lectures are 1 1/2 hrs to 2 hrs long and it is very hard for me to sit in front of my computer and listen to them. And then she adds all these extra videos for each unit, that in total, are at least an hour long. It is a lot of stuff, but I have to do better on this next exam, because I really want an "A" in this course.

For those of you who don't follow me on facebook, this past Monday, I got some wonderful news. I was selected to receive a full nursing school scholarship. I was 1 of 2 people and it is the best and highest scholarship the School of Nursing gives out. I was so happy, excited, shocked, etc. Totally unexpected. I was pretty sure that I would get some sort of scholarship, because the School of Nursing gives out a lot of money. I knew I had the GPA, resume, good essay, good recommendation letters, etc. But I also knew it was very competitive and we were told that probably 75% of this class met the requirements to apply for a scholarship. We had our 1st Nursing orientation session last Friday. We were told that they had extended the scholarship deadline and we would not find out if we were selected to get a scholarship until the 2nd week of August. Classes start the 3rd week, so as you can imagine, not too many people were happy about that. The particular scholarship that I'm being awarded requires the school to notify the recipients by June 30th. So that is why I found out sooner.

It is such a blessing and such an honor. I'm so thankful and really give God all the glory for this. Our family has been in some really tough financial situations lately. If there was not going to be scholarship money awarded, we were definitely going to have to take out loans. The scholarship may not cover all other expenses, and it does not cover the summer semester next year. But other than that, it funds the entire program and there are no requirements to keep the scholarship (such as GPA, etc.). This is such a blessing and took a huge burden off of my family and myself's shoulders. I had been applying for other scholarships (such as Solvay CF one, Boomer Esiason Transplant Grant, etc.) but had not heard back anything.

This summer is going by so fast, and before I know or realize it, I will be starting nursing school. YAY! Classes will be over the last week of July, with my last exam the 1st week of August. I'm hoping to fit some sort of mini vacation during my 2 week break before fall classes start.

I am babysitting tomorrow and next Friday. Then the next Friday, the 16th, I am taking the required CPR course for nursing school. So since I have classes 4 days a week, these next few weeks are going to be busy busy!

We had a really good CFF Young Professionals Board Meeting this past Tuesday. We are really excited to get this group up and going for our chapter. We have tried in the past, but the right people were not in the right place at that time. We are confident that the members on this board are very passionate about CF and really want to help find a cure. I was elected Secretary of the group, since I love taking notes, organizing, etc.

I hope everyone has a safe and fun holiday weekend!!!

Jesus is Better than Santa....

Santa lives at the North Pole.

JESUS is everywhere.

Santa rides in a sleigh

JESUS rides on the wind and walks on the water.

Santa comes but once a year

JESUS is an ever present help.

Santa fills your stockings with goodies

JESUS supplies all your needs.

Santa comes down your chimney uninvited

JESUS stands at your door and knocks.. and then enters your heart.

You have to stand in line to see Santa

JESUS is as close as the mention of His name.

Santa lets you sit on his lap

JESUS lets you rest in His arms.

Santa doesn't know your name, all he can say is "Hi little boy or girl, What's your name?"

JESUS knew our name before we did. Not only does He know our name, He knows our address too. He knows our history and future and He even knows how many hairs are on our heads.

Santa has a belly like a bowl full of jelly

JESUS has a heart full of love.

All Santa can offer is HO HO HO

JESUS offers health, help and hope.

Santa says "You better not cry"

JESUS says "Cast all your cares on me for I care for you.

Santa's little helpers make toys

JESUS makes new life, mends wounded hearts, repairs broken homes and builds mansions.

Santa may make you chuckle but

JESUS gives you joy that is your strength.

While Santa puts gifts under your tree

JESUS became our gift and died on the tree.


It's obvious there is really no comparison.
We need to remember WHO Christmas is all about.
We need to put Christ back in Christmas.
Jesus is still the reason for the season.

Believe

BELIEVE.....

That miracles happen
and that they can change your life.

Believe that you have an angel by your side
to help you through

and believe that anything is possible at Christmas,
for Jesus Christ is LORD!

Music Monday

SOON-AH WILL BE DONE

I had never heard this song before until Saturday night at the concert I attended benefiting Cystic Fibrosis. It was an alumni of men who participated in the famous Huffman High School Chansoniers Chorus from the years 1972-1997 (or rather, those were the ones who could dedicate and commit their time to doing the concert). Back in May, a retirement reception was held in honor of the choir director who had been at Huffman High School for many many years. At the retirement party, some of the members of the choir started singing and thought it would be fun to get together and do a concert. In the midst of planning the concert, they decided why don't we support a couple of charities while doing this. They stated that they would have loads of fun, but at the same time making a difference in the lives of those affected by the charity they would choose.

Anyways...to make a long story short, this particular high school men's chorus became very popular and people from all over the state use to travel to hear them sing. This weekend, people from Tennessee, Georgia and all over Alabama drove to attend this concert. I'm not sure how much the tickets cost, because mine was free, but both show times were sold out. An awesome $10,000 was raised for EACH charity, for a total of $20,000!!! I think the choir director said the sanctuary held maybe 750 people? It was a very neat experience and the best singing by a men's chorus I have ever heard! And the neat thing was that the majority of the songs were Christian or faith-based.

This is one of the songs the Chansoniers sang. And NO, this is not them singing....but this particular group sounded good when I looked on YouTube :) I hope you will take just a minute to listen to it. I think it is an awesome song...lyrics and how it sounds musically! Enjoy!

When You Thought I Wasn't looking...

WHEN YOU THOUGHT I WASN'T LOOKING

A message every adult should read because children
are watching you and doing as you do, not as you say.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you hang my
first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately
wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feed a
stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind
to animals.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make my
favorite cake for me, and I learned that the little
things can be the special things in life.

When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a
prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could always
talk to, and I learned to trust in Him.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make a
meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I
learned that we all have to help take care of each other.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you take care
of our house and everyone in it, and I learned we have
to take care of what we are given.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw how you
handled your responsibilities, even when you didn't
feel good, and I learned that I would have to be
responsible when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come
from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things
hurt, but it's all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you
cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of
life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and
productive person when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and
wanted to say,'Thanks for all the things I saw when
you thought I wasn't looking'

Each of us (parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, teacher, friend) influences the life of a child. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

Weekend Wrap-Up

WARNING: LONG POST! I know I haven't blogged much this week...sorry! I wanted to write a brief update on my health and other stuff, since I really haven't talked about that in the last few weeks! I have been swamped with studying, work and other stuff!!

(oh and before i begin, for those of you that commented on facebook about my bad week of charlie horses; the potassium tab helped...no spasms last night!)

Until this past week, I had actually been feeling really good. This was definitely a blessing, as it was the best I had felt in a long while! However, since LAST Sunday, I haven't felt too good, but was hoping it was just a bad few days. After talking with my tx coordinator on Tuesday, she was concerned and told me to call her back on Wed. Well, Wed and Thursday I felt better, so I opted not to call back and see how this weekend went. Well, needless to say, I currently feel like I've been run-over by an 18-wheeler truck and in the midst of a spinning tornado! No, it's not the flu and I don't think its anything as serious as pneumonia, but I really don't know! I've been having extreme issues with my body shaking!! And I mean REALLY bad. It's been worse ever since my steroid burst back in June. But over the last month it has been insane and I don't know what to do. Any suggestions or thoughts? I had my prograf levels checked about a month ago, and they were fine..even low. And I haven't been able to make my team of doctors figure this out. But now I'm to the point where i have to. The other day when I was in the gas station getting a snack for class, the register guy and I exchanged the normal "hello, how are you." Then as I'm getting money out of my wallet, he asks me several times if I'm ok? Very embarrassing!

Anyways, in addition to the shaking, I'm having severe rib/chest pain (achy and sharp) and are not sure what it is related to either. My back has decided to start spassing up again, which when this all happens together, it makes me extremely sob!

I FINALLY had an appointment with my GI doc last week. I am scheduled for a few tests October 28th to hopefully find out the origin and reason of the fluid hanging out around my liver. He doesn't think it is anything serious, but really doesn't know. Depending on the results of the tests, we may do some tests on my heart, to make sure it isn't coming from there!

In other NON-HEALTH-RELATED news....my anatomy class is kicking me in the butt!!! I am in grave danger of passing the course and feel so overwhelmed with it right now. Some of you may think no big deal. But I've always been a great student...very high GPA, top of the class, etc., I've never had this much trouble with a class. I'm looking into some additional resources and are praying every day that i can just "pass" the class; although I'd prefer a much better grade (but unfortunately can't make that happen now). So I could really use some prayers for this. I can't drop the class; i have to have it!!!

We had a memorial service for my grandfather last Monday! It was really nice and a lot of his friends and family got up to share some wonderful memories, including myself! I miss him but know he is in heaven re-uniting with his loved ones!!! And as someone mentioned recently, he is probably playing his violin in Heaven's orchestra!!

I have not been able to make it to church/Sunday school in several months, and this really breaks my heart and frustrates me more than ever. I want to be there and I need to be there. But sometimes my body has other plans! I miss being in God's presence on Sunday mornings, worshiping with others! Every Saturday night i say to myself that I am going to get up no-matter what and go to church, but then Sunday morning rolls around and my body just can't do it. And then later in the day, I think to myself, why didn't i just push a little harder??

Sorry for the long post!! The blogging this week may be short, as I'm really trying to study for an upcoming test the following week! I'm hoping for some health answers as well and will definitely keep you updated when I know something!! We have had 2 people recently get transplanted and they are doing awesome!!!

I hope everyone has a great week! I am reading your blogs and trying to comment when able! I still have several things to share with you, which hopefully will be soon!!I am praying for all of you!!! Oh yea...ROLL TIDE!!!!!!!!!!!

Grandfather

The Lord finally decided to take my grandfather home last night!! It is so comforting to know PaPaw is pain-free and in the best hands ever!!! He definitely was the strongest person I knew and definitely put up a fight!!!! I will miss him very much, but know he lived his 95 years of life on this earth to the fullest!!!

Recap: About Me Part III

Here is the recap About Me Part III post!

Picking up from where I left off: I had just been admitted to the hospital through the emergency room during spring break of my senior year in high school. So right before I left the hospital, my CF doctor came to my room to talk to my Mom and me. I kind of had an idea of what it would be about, but didn't want to think about it. My doctor felt that I needed to be listed for a lung transplant, that there was no "bouncing back" from this and this would be the only option to save my life. I denied it of course, went home, and concentrated on finishing up the school year. By the grace of God, I finished up most of the remaining school year at home, and graduated as Valedictorian with a 4.12 GPA. Graduation night was tough and not very fun. As soon as it was over, I went home, aching for the O2.

As I realized I was not getting better, I began to pray and ask God, was this what needed to be done? I cried and fought with him, hoping there was another way. I kept asking him, why me, why now? I then realized, that no, a transplant was the only thing that was going to save my life, and God would get me through this. I immediately jumped on the decision and got evaluated and listed at University of Alabama at Birmingham. Because I had been listed as a pediatric patient (see previous post), I had already accumulated about 2 years worth of time on the list. The thought was that I would get transplanted sooner than later, and everything would be fine.

However, that was not God's plan. I waited and waited for lungs to come along (and I actually was #1 on the list very quickly after being listed). I prayed every day. I also started doing several independent bible studies. I wanted to be prepared and needed some comfort during this rough time. After I got listed, I really never worried about the transplant. I knew there was a possibility that I would not survive the transplant, or die shortly after. However, I had a peace about it, and was more anxious to get it over with than anything. I knew I was in God's hands, and he was in control.

My health remained stable (as stable as it could be) until about January of 2004. At this time, it definitely took a turn for the worst. I went in the hospital in late January of that year. I spent about 2 weeks in, getting the usual IV abx, PT, high calorie foods, etc. I also spent my b'day in the hospital, but had 3 surprise parties that day by different people. It was truly a fun and blessed day. I hadn't really felt any better as I was nearing the 14-day stay. I fudged a little and told everyone I was ready to go home. At this point, I did not do PFT's (lung function tests), because I was to sick. So there was no "measuring" to see if I was well enough to be discharged. I knew I probably needed to stay, but ached to spend just a few days at home, in my own bed, for possibly the last time.

So my theory came true, and I ended up back in the hospital 2 days later, in a much much worse condition. I was getting 12 liters of oxygen, albuterol aerosols every 2 hours, morphine aerosols, constant antibiotic medications, and medications to relive pain and anxiety. I knew it was serious, and knew if I didn't get a transplant soon, I would be in trouble. I don't think I realized how soon this needed to happen, as the next 1-2 weeks of events flew by. I got worse pretty much every day. There may have been a day or two where I stabilized, but not much. I was only getting a couple of hours of sleep at this time, and at times, was so "out of it" I had no idea what was going on.

Because no cadaver lungs had become available, my parents discussed with my CF doctor and one from the UAB transplant team about considering a living donor transplant. (See this post for explanation of what a living donor transplant is). Everyone decided to go ahead and prepare for a living donor transplant, but with hopes it would not come to that. I knew that they had talked about it, and many people started stepping up to be tested. But deep down, I kept thinking to myself, that it would never get to that point, and I would get cadaver lungs in no time. And I kept thinking that up until the transplant. Once again, God had a different plan than what I wanted to happen.

To Be Continued (and the next post About Me will be the last).....

Take Back America

I’ve heard so much “It’s just hopeless; there’s nothing I can do.” That’s the way a lot of Americans feel; but, we CAN do something. Besides praying for our country, we need to do everything we can to turn it around.

How to Take Back America Conference webcast live this weekend at AFA.net (September 25-26th)

The event begins this Friday morning and ends on Saturday evening. The entire conference will be streamed live on AFA.net.

The AFA (American Family Association) has joined together with a consortium of conservative organizations to host a top-rate, momentum building, leadership conference that will teach the grassroots how to use the Internet and how to connect after the conference using new technologies like "Webinar," as well as equip them with talking points on battle-front issues and record every workshop. Here is your opportunity to see every great workshop and speech given at this year's conference.

Review and choose the workshops you want to see - at no cost!
-How conservatives can win in 2010
-How to deal with vote fraud, the Census, and ACORN
-How to lobby federal legislation & policy
-How to bring youth into the conservative movement
-How to defend traditional marriage and DOMA
-How to understand Islam
-How the media can help us take back America
-How to stop feminist and gay attacks on the military
-How to counter the homosexual movement
-How to stop the entry of illegal aliens and drugs
-How to deal with global warming, cap and trade
-How to stop the killings: pro-life solutions


WHO IS AFA?
The American Family Association (AFA) was founded in 1977 by Donald E. Wildmon, who was pastoring First United Methodist Church in Southaven, Mississippi, at the time. The American Family Association represents and stands for traditional family values and exists to motivate and equip citizens to reform our culture to reflect Biblical truth on which it was founded. We believe that God has communicated absolute truth to man through nature and the Bible, and that all men everywhere and at all times are subject to His authority. Therefore, a culture based on Biblical truth best serves the well-being of our country as evidenced by the vision of our forefathers as set forth in the Declaration of Independence.

Today, AFA is one of the largest and most effective pro-family organizations in the country. The impact of AFA on pro-family issues is recognized nationwide. It is AFA’s goal to be a champion of Christian activism.

To that end, AFA spurs activism directed to:
* Preservation of Marriage and the Family
* Decency and Morality
* Sanctity of Human Life
* Stewardship
* Media Integrity

Click here to learn more about AFA, how it has made an impact on our nation, AFA’s recent accomplishments, and how to sign up for AFA action alerts and special projects!

Grandfather

I wanted to give a quick update on my grandfather! We have continued to struggle in disagreement regarding treatment for my grandfather! It has been a family battle against his wife (my step-grandmother, etc.). My grandfather did start doing better, but she (wife) still wanted to stop treatment, even after the doctor told her that this was not "that" type of situation! That he could recover and be fine! When the doctor told her this, it was good news for the rest of the family, hoping that she would change her mine. In addition, my grandfather was alert and could understand/comprehend the situation enough to make a decision himself. And for her to stop treatment, would technically be illegal.

On Thursday, we found out that my grandfather had contracted pneumonia (hospital-based), and his kidneys were not filtering properly. They started him on antibiotics for the pneumonia, as well as supplemental oxygen! And he really started improving, and he said he felt so much better! However, yesterday morning (Friday), my step-grandmother, once again, decided that all the antibiotics and treatment needed to be stopped. That this would just prolong the pain and suffering from him, and there was no point in trying to "make him better." Everyone in the family (well, except for one of the sisters) was in complete disagreement! My parents, as well as my uncle, talked to my grandfather yesterday, and he was telling them how he was not ready to get on that "train" yet! That he had been praying to the Lord for exactly a day and a half, asking for God's guidance, and what he needed to do. My grandfather (I call him PaPaw) said that the Lord gave him that answer, and told him to keep fighting. PaPaw said that he was at the bottom of the ladder, but after praying, he had begun working his way back up! To me, that shows that he is not ready to die, and he wants to fight this if all possible.

However, my step-grandmother (she is really my grandmother I guess, since she married him before I was even born) had a different opinion. So she discussed with the case-manager yesterday morning, convinced one of the doctors to agree with her, and made the decision to call in hospice, and discontinue all treatment. He was started on morphine pump within minutes (and yet he was in no pain). Between yesterday and this morning, my parents, and my aunt and uncle, have been praying and trying to decide on what to do. How do they turn around the decision and prove to the doctors, but mainly my grandmother, that PaPaw was not ready to go home. That we was plenty alert to make a competent decision. My uncle spent the night with him last night. And he straight up asked PaPaw if he was ready. And PaPaw said no, that "what harm could the antibiotics do"?

Then this morning rolls around, and PaPaw is not doing well. He is much sicker, not very alert, confused slightly, and just sort of "out of it." One of the doctors still called my grandmother to tell her that this was treatable. However, she still said that she didn't want to prolong this for him. I'm so furious with her!! It's unreal! And it was like it was almost a blessing in disguise for her that he was worse this morning, so we would have a more difficult time "arguing" or disagreeing with her.

However, after my mom and uncle talked a little while ago, they decided not to fight my grandmother any longer. PaPaw is really a lot worse this morning (of course it's probably because they stopped the antibiotics. Pneumonia can eat anyone up quick without treatment). Therefore, it's just a matter of time. Maybe hours, maybe days, who knows! We are all fine with God taking him home when God is ready, and we were fine with letting a natural course decide PaPaw's death, but not a decision like this. However, we know God is watching over him. PaPaw is going to Heaven. He has lived an awesome 95 years, and was always going strong. But now his time has come to grace the gates of Heaven!

So I ask for your prayers, for PaPaw to die peacefully, to not be in any pain. I ask for prayers for his 4 daughters (one of them being my mom) and their families. This has been a very tense situation from the get-go, and has caused a lot of stress among family. (which I don't blame...it's caused me stress too). And I guess we need to pray for my grandmother. Especially for her spiritually, that she will learn how to trust in the Lord, and hopefully know where she is going when her time comes. Based on these last few weeks, her actions have not demonstrated love for the Lord, and she has not shown her love for her husband or family in a God-loving way.

Thank you to those who have already been praying for my grandfather! I did go down to the hospital last night (gloved, gowned, and masked) and visited with him for awhile. He was perfectly alert and had remembered things I had told him or things my mom had told him about me from MONTHS ago! He told me how proud he was of me and how he wanted me to promise him that I would be careful on my upcoming trips. He had looked at my cruise pictures a few days ago, and told me how beautiful I was. I've always loved him so much..he has had the perfect attitude, and always handled me and CF great...never pressured me, never freaked out, always loving!

Sorry for the long post. This is going to be a tough week, tougher than it has been! I'm also still fighting off this respiratory infection. I have a bronch on Monday, which really needs to be done, but may have to be postponed. I'm not sure what to do in that situation!

Friday Fill-Ins

Here I go again with another Friday Fill-In! Click here if you would like to participate!

1. My car gets awesome gas mileage and drives so smoothly...i love my car!

2. My anatomy lecture class 1st major exam is coming up next Monday, as long as I wake up from my bronchoscopy.

3. Lately, things seem crazy, hectic, and hard to understand why they are happening. I know God has a reason though, and hopefully things will turn around soon.

4. The Lake is one of my favorite 'hiding' places.

5. What happened Wednesday morning was amazing and so God-driven, regarding my grandfather. It's amazing how God works little things into situations.

6. Finding a cure for CF is not impossible!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to relaxing, but it will be coupled with studying; tomorrow my plans include resting and studying and Sunday, I want to really be able to make it to church!

Music Monday-You're Not Shaken by Phil Stacey

This week's song is by Phil Stacey (from American Idol): You're Not Shaken!

Have you been having a rough time lately? Are you questioning God why certain events have taken place? Remember that God is not shaken, and he will never let his people shake! You may not understand, but just TRUST HIS plan he has for you! What you are going through now, is part of that plan! God has never left you...so don't let go of HIM now!




(On a side note: I chose this song last week (I think on Tuesday), and scheduled this post. As I was posting this, I was thinking that this song really didn't apply to me personally right now. I was mainly posting it for other people. But after this past week's event, especially losing loved ones, it does apply. It's amazing how God works...he knew what was to come!) I hope you enjoy this week's song!

Music Monday/Hope in Difficult Times

Hope: "The confident, joyful expectation that God is working, both now and in the future, for MY GOOD, and for HIS GLORY!"

Every now and then I like to incorporate God's Word with some of my Music Monday posts. I really encourage you to read ALL THE WAY through this post and not just listen to the song!! I believe these words of God are very encouraging!

I mentioned before that the theme this year for our church's Sunday sermons is Hope. This past Sunday kicked off a series for Hope in Difficult Times! And WOW...was it a powerful message!!!!! I was in tears as most of the congregation was because of how powerful the message was and other events surrounding Sunday morning.

So this week's song (I may have done it before....sorry if I did) is "In Christ Alone." The version I am posting is by the Newsboys! In Christ Alone, my Hope is Found!



"Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful." Hebrews 10:23

Whether the difficult times for you are related to an illness, divorce, financial debt, depression, special needs child, etc., we ALL are groaning inwardly as we wait for God to restore ALL of creation! God will restore all of creation and God will restore and redeem MY body!! "For in this hope, we were saved! But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience." Romans 8: 23-25

Remember that God is with YOU through your suffering! God is with you during your darkest moment. "The Holy Spirit helps us in our inabilities; the spirit intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words." Romans 8:26-27

It is hard sometimes to realize that God is using our suffering for our good. I think it is especially hard for CF patients to continue through life without losing Hope. God has predestined (already decided) what struggles we will go through in life! All things work together according to His purpose! Each time I go in the hospital with pneumonia, it's part of God's plan! He is working inside of me! He is conforming me to the image of his Son, Jesus. If you truly love God, then you have Hope in Him. And you can rely on this hope during difficult times! It's all part of your journey on Earth. None of it is a surprise to God.

I think it's amazing to think of it this way. Over the last 5 years since my transplant, I always respond to getting sick or other post-transplant issues in a different way. Yes, sometimes I get frustrated. But I know that something good will come out of it, that God is working in me! And that gives me Hope; it gives me the strength I need to move and carry on. I know he is right there beside me helping me through!

In Romans 8:18, it says, "For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us." Yes, it sad that we go through these struggles, and a lot of them are very difficult to endure; but none of our difficult times/struggles (even CF, cancer, etc.) compare to the Glory that God will reveal; to the redemption of our bodies; and to the restoration of all creation!

So my prayer for you this week is: "May the God of HOPE fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope."
(Romans 15:13)

Christ Jesus is our Hope!!!!!

Anonymous Comment...Seriously???

So when i returned home from my trip, i was checking the many emails I had, and came across this email, from which a comment was received on my blog from this post! It made me too mad, not to comment on it!
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Anonymous said...
Not to be a downer, but is it really a good idea to become a nurse? The reason I ask is that it only takes one bug to get into your new lungs and destroy the gift that God gave you. No offense, but I personally think that is irresponsible. What would the donor's family think if something like that happened? I don't think they'd be too pleased.
I have CF and waiting for my double lung transplant and I'd never put myself at risk like that. That is why when we are in the hospital they want us out ASAP so we don't pick up anymore bugs. Being a nurse would expose you daily to bacteria, viral infections and so on. Not a good idea.
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Because it was from an anonymous person, I can't respond to them specifically! However, in case this anonymous person reads my blog on a daily basis or whenever I post new material, I want to respond to you! And I want to let my readers know why I disagree and actually feel offended and upset by this post!

First off, in response to "what would the donor's family think?" Well, the other donor's family is my mother and a family best friend! And my parents have always taught me to go for my dreams and goals in life and not let anything stop them. And the family friend who donated the 2nd lung/lobe would be all for this decision as well! They are all 100% supportive in this decision! And while catching a bug or bacteria is not in my "plans," my "donors" or friends/family are not going to be offended or displeased if something like that did happen! Unfortunately, I've had my share of lung infections since transplant without even being a nurse or working in a healthcare environment! And believe it or not, my entire transplant team of doctors, nurses, etc., all support me in this decision too!

Secondly, I don't think it is irresponsible! There are several of you bloggers out there that are CFers AND nurses! I also know 2 friends locally who have CF and have had a transplant and are currently practicing nursing in a hospital. I do realize that there are some risks associated with becoming a nurse, but nothing that I do is going to endanger anyone else! This is my dream job/career that I've wanted since I was 3 years old! I will take the necessary precautions to keep me as healthy as possible! But it IS POSSIBLE to be a nurse and work in areas that put you in less risk of catching certain bugs or bacteria!

Thirdly, I believe with all my heart God BLESSED me with CF and with my transplant! It truly was a miracle performed by HIM! And there is no possible way that I would have survived being so sick and through the actual procedure and recovery if it wasn't for my Lord and Savior! He is truly the one that gets all the credit! And never in a million years would I view it as destroying the gift that God gave me! Seriously....that comment right there ticks me off so bad.....i'm screaming inside right now! You...."anonymous commenter" say: "not to be a downer, and no offense," Well, i take major offense by some of these comments, and yes, you are being a downer! (Just FYI)!

I know very well why CFers go in the hospital! Obviously, I've been there, done that! While I'm sorry you feel this way, and I'm sorry you are sick enough to be on the transplant list, I think you are looking at this from the wrong point of view! I know there are people who disagree with me wanting to become a nurse! That's fine! Express your opinions, but keep these rude and offensive comments to yourself! God gave me this beautiful gift (beautiful new lungs), so I can continue with my life and pursue my dreams!!!! And this is what I want to do! There is a small risk associated with it, but I'm willing to take it! I'm not going to sit around and not even at least try or attempt to accomplish my goals and dreams! I think nursing will be an awesome career for me and I will be awesome at it! I love the field and truly want to make a difference in other's lives! I will never put anyone else at risk! And if I do catch some sort of bacteria, etc., it can be handled/treated, and we will cross that bridge when and if it ever gets there!

So...sorry if I offended you by my reply to your comment! But it really offended me...especially bringing the donors (who are family members) and God into the "picture", it was seriously unacceptable and extremely rude! However, I've discarded and deleted your comment and email, and hope the best for you in your upcoming and hopefully soon transplant! May God Bless you through your transplant journey as well!

Music Monday- "Hold On"

This week's song is "Hold On" by 33 Miles (again)!

For God, who said, "Let Light Shine Out of Darkness," made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ!

Just give Jesus your hand...and HOLD ON! Jesus is always fighting for you! So when you think you can't go on any longer, or feel like you've lost your faith, or strength...just hold on a little longer! Hold on to Jesus....He will get you standing tall again!



"The LORD is slow to anger and great in power; the LORD will not leave the guilty unpunished. His way is in the whirlwind and the storm, and clouds are the dust of His feet." Nahum 1:3

I hope everyone is having a great Monday/week so far!

Music Monday-Jesus Calling

Wow...it's been awhile since I've posted a Music Monday! I plan on keeping up with it now!

Are you having a rough Monday? Or had a rough weekend? Listen to this song: Jesus Calling, by 33 Miles!



I made a few more changes to the layout of my blog! I divided my blog roll into several different categories. There was getting to be so many blogs I followed and wanted to share, that I was getting confused of what type of blog each one was! So I hope this division into categories better helps you as well! For newcomers to my blog, I thought this might be a good idea, so they could visit the blogs that better suited their lifestyle/situation! If I have left your blog off or you would like me to add your blog, please let me know!

Also, for those you you that were seeing my 3rd column of the blog at the bottom of the page instead of the top, that was a minor glitch on my part, and has now been fixed! Thanks Brandi for letting me know!

Music Monday

Finally...Music Monday! This song, "In Christ Alone" is by the Newsboys! We sang this song in church yesterday! And yes...I finally made it to church AND Sunday school! And man was it good to be back! This an awesome song and I LOVE singing it! The lyrics really speak the truth! Christ is my strength, my comforter, my all in all! Sin's curse has lost it's grip on me because of Jesus Christ! The wrath of God was fulfilled that day Jesus died on the cross. And because of that, we have the power of Christ within us. We fear no death, nor guilt. Our faith rests in Him and in Christ alone, I stand firm! God commands my destiny, and nothing will take me away from Him until he calls me Home! Christ is the beginning and the end! ENJOY!!